這些跡象表明你現在的戀情很糟糕
You hate the sound of him chewing and are a little bummed he still doesn't know your favorite flower (peonies!), but are those deal breakers or just signs of being with someone for a bajillion years? According to Marina Voron, licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship red flags have less to do with actual behavior and more to do with the feelings and intentions behind them. Here, Voron shares reasons it may be time to cue Adele and call it quits.
你不喜歡他嚼東西時發出的聲音、對於他仍然不知道你最喜歡什麼花（牡丹）這一點你也有點小失望，但這些究竟是風險點還是隻是和某人在一起很多年的跡象呢？持證婚姻與家庭治療師瑪麗娜·沃龍表示，感情中的危險信號與實際行爲沒什麼關係，反而與行爲後的感受和意圖有很大關係。在此，沃龍分享了一些理由，可能是時候提醒阿黛爾，宣佈這段感情的結束了。
1. There is a decline in intimacy.
1. 你們越來越不親密。
It's normal to be hot and heavy in the beginning - every long-term relationship will have its ups and downs in the bedroom. I'm talking about going three months without s** or consistently facing rejection when you initiate. It could also be a decline in the quality of s**. For example, it feels mechanical, like neither one of you is really present, and not just because you can't stop thinking about a work or personal problem. This is happening every time.
剛開始的時候如膠似漆是很正常的--每一段長期的戀情都會在房事上有起有伏。我說的是你們已經有三個月沒有性生活了，或是當你發起攻勢卻一直被另一半拒絕。也有可能是性生活質量下降了。比如，感覺性是件機械的事情，就好像你們沒有一個人真正在場一般，而這並不只是因爲你必須思考工作或個人的問題。每一次那個時都在發生這樣的事情。
2. Your relationship is lacking fun.
2. 你們的感情缺少樂趣。
The healthiest relationships are brimming with positivity and lightheartedness. After all, playfulness helps you to de-stress, connect, and turn to each other in times of need. You should be able to turn off the world and just enjoy yourself when you're together. If you start to feel anxious or stressed when you're with your partner, you might be treading into problem territory.
最健康的戀情充滿着正能量和輕鬆感。畢竟，樂趣能夠幫你們減壓、讓你們心有靈犀、能在需要的時候幫助對方。當你們在一起時，你們應該能夠不與外界聯繫，享受二人世界。如果當你和另一半在一起時，你感到焦慮或壓力，那你們可能已經出了問題。
3. Your S.O. becomes disrespectful.
3. 你的另一半變得不尊重人了。
When you start being spiteful, critical, or belittling of one another, it's no bueno. Contempt is the no. 1 predictor of relationship combustion, Voron says, and it's something that couples may not notice if it happens gradually over time. Look for mean-spirited sarcasm - that's a huge red flag.
當你們開始對彼此刻毒、說三道四或是互相看不起時，這可不是什麼好事。輕蔑是戀情慢慢被耗盡的頭號預報器，沃龍說道，而且如果這種態度是隨着時間的推移慢慢發生的話，情侶可能都會注意不到。注意刻薄的諷刺--這可是巨大的危險信號。
4. You or your partner pays more attention to your phone than to each other.
4. 你或你的另一半對手機的注意力比對彼此的還多。
You'd be amazed by the number of couples who sit across from Voron in therapy and get right on their phones, she says. When you're together, be together. If your partner is always on the phone, that's a sign of rejection, and it can hurt.
沃龍在治療過程中碰到的夫妻會坐在他的對面並立即掏出他們手機，數量之多會讓你驚訝，她說道。當你們在一起時，就好好在一起，如果你的另一半總是玩手機，那這就是拒絕你的跡象，真的很傷人。
