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經典英語冷笑話7篇

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下面是本站小編整理的經典英語冷笑話,希望對大家有幫助。

經典英語冷笑話7篇

  經典英語冷笑話:

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

"She is the one who sells the candy."

小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。

“昨天給你的錢幹什麼了?”

“我給了一個可憐的老太婆,”他回答說。 “你真是個好孩子,”媽媽驕傲地說。“再給你兩分錢。可你爲什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢?”

“她是個賣糖果的。”

  經典英語冷笑話:Improvement

One student to another: "How are your English lessons coming along?"

"Fine. I used to be one who couldn't understand the English men, and now it's the English men who can't understand me."

進步

一位學生對另一位說:“你的 英語 最近學的怎麼樣?”

“很好,我過去不懂英國人說話,可現在是英國人不懂我的話了。”

  經典英語冷笑話:

The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.

"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"

"Ah, yes," answered the little girl. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"

一個小女孩非常不喜歡狗狂叫的樣子。

“沒有關係,”一位先生說,“不用害怕,你知道這條諺語嗎:‘吠狗不咬人。’”

“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道嗎?”

  經典英語冷笑話

Teacher: "John, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"

John: "What do you think it is, sir?"

Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"

John: "I don't think I know either, sir!"‘

老師:“John,動詞ring的過去分詞是什麼?”。

約翰:“你想它是什麼呢”?

老師:“我不用想,我知道!”。

約翰:“我想我不知道”。

  經典英語冷笑話:

An artist was part of an exhibition, and he asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings that were currently on display.

"I've got good news and bad news," the owner replied.

"Give me the good news first," the artist demanded.

"The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it wouldappreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings."

"That's wonderful!" the artist exclaimed, "What could the bad news possibly be?"

With concern, the gallery owner replied, "The gentleman in question was your doctor."

以爲藝術家在一個畫廊辦了個展覽,他問店主是否有人對他參展的畫感興趣。

“我有一個好消息和一個壞消息。”店主回答。

“先告訴我好消息。”畫家要求道。

“好消息是一位紳士詢問了你的作品,還問它是否會在你死後增。我告訴他會的,然後他買下了你所有的15幅畫作。”

“那太棒了!”畫家驚歎。“那麼什麼會是壞消息呢?”

店主想了想之後說:“問那個問題的是你的醫生”。

  經典英語冷笑話:

Teacher: "John, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"

John: "What do you think it is, sir?"

Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"

John: "I don't think I know either, sir!"

老師:“John,動詞ring的過去分詞是什麼?”。

約翰:“你想它是什麼呢”?

老師:“我不用想,我知道!”。

約翰:“我想我不知道”。

  經典英語冷笑話:

A Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. "Now, children," said she , "has anyone of you ever make someone else glad?"

"Please, teacher,"said a small boy,"I've make someone glad yesterday."

"Well done. Who was that?"

"My granny."

"Good boy. Now tell us how you made your grandmother glad."

"Please, teacher, I went to see her yesterday, and stayed with her three hours. Then I said to her, 'Granny, I'm going home,' and she said, 'Well, I'm glad'!"

一個主日學校校(基督教教會爲了向兒童灌輸宗教思想, 在星期天開辦的兒童班)的老師在對學生講使別人高興的重要性。“現在,孩子們,”她說:“你們當中有誰讓別人高興過?”

“我,老師,”一個小男孩說:“昨天我就使別人高興過。”

“做得好,是誰呢?”

“我奶奶。”

“好孩子。現在告訴我們,你是怎樣使你奶奶高興的。”

“是這樣的,老師。我昨天去看她,在她那兒呆了三個小時。然後我跟她說:‘奶奶,我要回家了。’她說:‘啊,我很高興!’”