十個人們不再遵守的禮儀(3)
Baby Shower Per Mom
3.迎嬰派對Mimosas, cake and teeny-tiny outfits – what's not to love about baby showers? With having and raising kids becoming more expensive than ever, most parents-to-be appreciate the spoils a shower has to offer. In the past, the party could only be thrown by someone unrelated to the expectant couple, because a shower given by a family member would imply that the couple was pandering for gifts.
每次都是蛋糕、嬰兒的小衣服，對迎嬰派對真是累覺不愛。相比過去，雖然養育一個孩子的成本要高出很多，許多準爸媽們還是希望用這派對好好慶祝。在過去，參加派對的都是準爸媽們的同事密友好閨蜜，如果是親屬張羅派對就有點悖理，明擺着請人來給自家送禮嘛。
In the early days of baby showers it might not have been obvious or mandatory to bring a present for the wee one, but let's be real here: Today, no one would dare show up empty-handed to a shower, so does it really matter who purchases the punch and sends out the invitations?
早先參加迎嬰派對並無明文規定要求朋友們帶禮物。但現在情況有所不同，沒人會空着手參加派對，因此活動開始變得正式起來，爲表誠意，準爸媽們辦派對前要發出請柬，買好潘趣酒。
Another emerging trend that some people find irksome is multiple showers for subsequent babies. I completely understand where these people are coming from. Showers are time-consuming and gifts are pricey, so unless you have limitless funds it can seem like overkill to gift the same mother three or four times. On the other hand, my third boy is no less special than my first, and I once read somewhere that every baby deserves to be celebrated.
另一個趨勢就是現在人們對二胎，三胎等的孩子的迎嬰派對越來越冷淡，甚至心有抱怨了。我完全理解他們爲什麼有此感覺，參加派對很佔時間，送出的禮物往往也價格不菲，所以除非你是錢多多，否則給同一個媽媽送三次甚至四次禮物，這還真是給人無底洞的恐懼。但是換句話說，作爲爸媽，我的第三個小兒子出生時同第一胎一樣那麼讓人激動。我曾在哪裏讀過這樣一句話：每個生命都值得慶祝。One way to strike a balance for subsequent pregnancies is to opt for a more low-key shindig. Skip the custom invitations, fondant cake and 50-person guest list for an intimate lunch with your nearest and dearest because they're probably going to be the ones involved in your child's life, anyway!
改善這一問題的一種辦法就是讓又懷孕的準媽媽們把派對辦得簡單低調些，跳過發請柬環節，做一個方旦糖蛋糕，辦一個五十人左右規模的密友派對。不管怎樣，這些與你關係緊密的人日後很可能會成爲孩子成長髮展的重要角色。onal Contact on Special Occasions
2.出席朋友的重要時刻
When someone I love calls or visits to say "Happy Birthday" I get a completely different vibe than when the same person sends a text bearing the sentiment. No matter how many cutesy emoticons you include, it's simply impossible to convey the same joy over electronics that personal contact achieves so easily.
深愛的親朋好友在我生日那天打來電話或是親自登門對我說“生日快樂”，我會高興到睡不着，然而假如同樣是他們，在我生日的時候只是發送了一條包含深情的短信，不管其內容多麼討人喜歡，我感受到的也只是失落。通過電子設備傳達的喜悅完全不能與親自交流聯繫相媲美。Today, texting and social media have all but replaced birthday cards and other types of personal contact on special occasions. Although some might maintain that these avenues allow us to keep in touch with more people at once, others point out that such interactions are superficial in nature and rude to fall back on. "Too many people take the lazy route on birthdays, holidays and other special occasions," says Desiree J. "Not being on social media forces me to really connect with people on a regular basis, rather than resorting to some canned wall post."
我們身處的這個時代裏，短信和各種大衆媒體已經幾乎代替了傳統的生日賀卡及親自出席好友生命中一些特別的時刻。雖然這種方式可以讓我們在同一時間與更多的人保持聯繫，但有人指出這種聯繫實際上是膚淺的，也是不禮貌的。“現在的人大多選擇慵懶的方式來慶祝生日、節日和其他的特殊時刻了，”德西蕾（Desiree J）說，“無法接觸大衆媒體才能逼迫我們正常地與他人交流，而不是訴諸於各種網站上的留言。”Etiquette experts are rolling with the times to fold tech advancements in with birthday and special occasion etiquette. Acquaintances or old friends you primarily connect with via Facebook can get by with merely a wall post, but folks you text regularly warrant a minimum of a text or phone call. The extra-special people in your life, like siblings, significant others and close family should be acknowledged in person whenever possible, or by phone, Skype or other personal avenue .
隨着時代的改變，禮儀專家認爲我們需要將當今的科技成果融入生日及其他特殊時刻的禮儀中。那些平時只通過QQ、微信、微博等聯繫的朋友可以通過留言來表達自己的問候，而親朋好友必須至少要有短信或是電話的問候才較爲妥當。那些特別親密的親戚朋友更是應當儘量當面表達自己的祝福，實在沒辦法出席的情況下則要用電話、視頻或其他互動方式來送上祝福。Celebrating Yourself
1.不要獨自慶祝
Although considered fairly tacky in the past, some etiquette experts can handle the trend of self-celebration, as long as it's done with style. For example, inviting guests to a birthday party where they have to provide or pay for food, drinks and the implied gift is placing the burden squarely on their shoulders, despite the fact that you planned the soiree. By contrast, hosting a party with all the trimmings on a date that just happens to be on or near your birthday relieves the attendees from responsibility. There's no sense in moping around, wishing for a fete you're physically and financially capable of throwing yourself, so do it up right and toast yourself quietly for bucking a pretty benign tradition!
雖然在過去，獨自籌備慶典是有些失禮的，然而現在請禮儀專家來幫忙做出自己個性的宴會已經逐漸成爲趨勢。舉例來說，以前舉辦生日派對，受邀請的客人需要提供食物或是爲自己的食物買單，另外還要送上生日禮物，雖然說你已經籌劃了整個聚會，可這些對客人來說仍然是一種負擔。相比之下，在臨近生日或者生日這天，自己舉辦一場規模齊全的派對，便巧妙地把朋友們從這種負擔中解放出來了。沒有必要因爲沒有人爲自己舉辦派對而悶悶不樂，你完全有能力獨自承辦聚會，所以自己默默地舉杯慶祝打破了這一傳統吧！審校:淺芷湄 編輯:Freya然
