雙語暢銷書《艾倫圖靈傳》第3章:思考什麼是思考(49)

In a peculiar environment such as Cambridge, it might be a positive advantage to enjoy homosexual experience, simply in terms of the opportunity for physical release.

在奇怪的環境中，例如劍橋，有一個有利的優勢去享受同性戀，但只是生理方面。

The deprivation was not one of laws but of the spirit – a denial of identity.

難過之處，不是法律上的，而是精神上的――一種身份的拒絕。

Heterosexual love, desire and marriage were hardly free from problems and anguish, but had all the novels and songs ever written to express them.

異性戀的愛情、慾望和婚姻，儘管也有一些困難和痛苦，但還是會有很多的小說和音樂來表達和讚美它。

The homosexual equivalents were relegated – if mentioned at all – to the comic, the criminal, the pathological, or the disgusting.

而同性戀的價值，則是很低的，如果說得徹底些，是滑稽的，可恥的，病態的，噁心的。

To protect the self from these descriptions was hard enough, when they were embedded in the very words, the only words, that language offered.

當他們被嵌入這些詞語時，想保護自己不受傷是很難的。

To keep the self a complete and consistent whole, rather than split into a facade of conformity, and a secret inner truth, was a miracle.

想保持一個完整的自我，不分裂成一個守法的表象和一個隱祕的內心，則更加難。

To be able to develop the self, to increase its inner connections and to communicate with others – that was next to impossible.

發展自己的社會交際，增加自己與別人的溝通，則是根本不可能的。