海倫·凱勒自傳《我的生活》第8期

Chapter IV

第四章

The most important day I remember in all my life is the one on which my teacher, Anne Mansfield Sullivan, came to me. I am filled with wonder when I consider the immeasurable contrasts between the two lives which it connects. It was the third of March, 1887, three months before I was seven years old.

在我的一生中，最令我刻骨銘心的一天就是我的老師，安妮·曼斯菲爾德·蘇立文的到來。我心裏充滿了驚奇，我認爲在兩個將命運聯繫在一起的人之間一定存在着無限的差異。那天是1887年3月3日，三個月後我就滿七歲了。

On the afternoon of that eventful day, I stood on the porch, dumb, expectant. I guessed vaguely from my mother's signs and from the hurrying to and fro in the house that something unusual was about to happen, so I went to the door and waited on the steps. The afternoon sun penetrated the mass of honeysuckle that covered the porch, and fell on my upturned face. My fingers lingered almost unconsciously on the familiar leaves and blossoms which had just come forth to greet the sweet southern spring. I did not know what the future held of marvel or surprise for me. Anger and bitterness had preyed upon me continually for weeks and a deep languor had succeeded this passionate struggle.

那天下午，我站在門廊裏，似乎在默默地期待着什麼。我從房間里人們忙前忙後的動靜，以及母親的手勢裏隱約地猜到，家裏要有什麼事發生。所以，我就走出房門坐在臺階上等着。午後的陽光穿透門廊上茂密的金銀花藤，暖暖地灑落在我仰起的臉上。我的手指不由自主地遊移在那些熟悉的葉片和花蕾之間，初生的枝蔓似乎也忙不迭地向南方的春日致意。我不知道我的未來會發生什麼樣的奇蹟，一連好幾個星期，懊惱和苦悶折磨着我，深深的無助感令我抗爭不得。

Have you ever been at sea in a dense fog, when it seemed as if a tangible white darkness shut you in, and the great ship, tense and anxious, groped her way toward the shore with plummet and sounding-line, and you waited with beating heart for something to happen? I was like that ship before my education began, only I was without compass or sounding-line, and had no way of knowing how near the harbour was. "Light! give me light!" was the wordless cry of my soul, and the light of love shone on me in that very hour.

你是否曾到過濃霧籠罩的海面？一團白色的霧靄將你徹底封閉，而你腳下的那條大船，則焦慮不安地摸索前行，它邊走邊用鉛錘和探深繩尋找着靠岸的航道。那麼你呢？就帶着怦怦的心跳等待着未知事物的發生？在接受正式教育之前，我就像那艘漂盪在迷霧中的船，只是我沒有指南針和探深繩，也無從知曉港口的遠近。“光！給我光明！”這是發自我靈魂深處無言的吶喊，每分每秒，我都想把自己沐浴在愛的光明之中。

I felt approaching footsteps. I stretched out my hand as I supposed to my mother. Some one took it, and I was caught up and held close in the arms of her who had come to reveal all things to me, and, more than all things else, to love me.

我感覺到了走近的腳步聲，我伸出手，就像迎接母親那樣。有個人抓住了我的手，我被她緊緊地抱在懷中，她就是來向我揭示萬事萬物的人。事實上，比揭示萬事萬物更爲重要的是，她愛我。

The morning after my teacher came she led me into her room and gave me a doll. The little blind children at the Perkins Institution had sent it and Laura Bridgman had dressed it; but I did not know this until afterward. When I had played with it a little while, Miss Sullivan slowly spelled into my hand the word "d-o-l-l." I was at once interested in this finger play and tried to imitate it. When I finally succeeded in making the letters correctly I was flushed with childish pleasure and pride. Running downstairs to my mother I held up my hand and made the letters for doll. I did not know that I was spelling a word or even that words existed; I was simply making my fingers go in monkey-like imitation. In the days that followed I learned to spell in this uncomprehending way a great many words, among them pin, hat, cup and a few verbs like sit, stand and walk. But my teacher had been with me several weeks before I understood that everything has a name.

我記得在老師到來之後的次日早晨，她領我來到了她的房間，還給了我一個布娃娃。這個娃娃是帕金斯學院的一個小盲童送給蘇立文小姐的。勞拉·布里吉曼還給娃娃做了衣服穿，我也是後來才知道娃娃的來歷的。當時，我玩了一會兒手上的娃娃，蘇立文小姐則慢慢地在我手上拼寫“doll”這個詞。我立刻對這種手指遊戲產生了興趣，並且努力模仿。最終，我正確地拼寫出了單詞，我難以抑制我的快樂和自豪。後來，我跑到樓下母親身旁，我舉起手，然後在上面拼寫出“娃娃”的單詞。當時，我並不知道我拼寫的是一個單詞，我甚至不知道那些字詞是否存在，我只是調皮地用手指加以模仿而已。在隨後的幾天裏，我用這種懵懂的方式學會了拼寫很多詞，其中有像“pin，bat，cup”這樣的名詞，還有一些像“sit，stand，walk”之類的動詞。事實上，我是在和老師待了好幾星期後，才知道每件東西都有一個名字。