你應該掌握的現代社交禮儀

For nearly 250 years, it has advised the British public on the finer points of sociAl etiquette, from how to write a thank you note to what to do when one meets the Queen.

Now, Debrett’s has lifted the lid on its very Modern guide to good manners for the first time, disclosing the questions that most trouble the British public in 2014.

1. Mobile phone use

Debrett’s receive more enquiries about mobile use than any other device. According to Debrett’s, it is always rude to pay more attention to a phone than a person in the flesh, and they should always be put away when transacting other business – for example, when you're paying for something in a shop. They should be switched off in theatres, cinemas (including during the trailers!), art galleries, or any space where silence is desired.

2. Smoking e-cigarettes at work

As electronic cigarettes become more popular, so to do the number of enquiries that Debrett’s receive on the device. The most pressing question is whether they are acceptable in the workplace. According to Debrett’s they should never be used in a work environment. Vaping shows that you’re not focused on your work and may also be a distraction to your colleagues.

3. Social greeting: kissing

Many people are clearly unclear on the subject of social kissing. According to Debrett’s, kissing is not appropriate in many professional situations. On the whole it should only be used among friends, but not on first meeting. An air kiss, without contact, may seem rude or impersonal, so very slight contact is best but no sound effects are needed.

4. Eating and applying make-up on public transport

Debrett’s has been inundated with enquiries as to whether it’s acceptable to eat or apply make-up on public transport. According to Debrett’s you should avoid both. It’s inconsiderate to eat smelly food in a confined environment, and applying make-up on public transport can jeopardise that all-important first impression and make you appear disorganised.

5. Reclining your seat on aeroplanes

This is a common bugbear. According to Debrett’s, it's selfish to recline your seat back during short daytime flights. When travelling by plane always stay within your own designated space and don't hog the armrest. Also avoid kicking the back of the seat in front of you or using it as an aid to standing-up.

6. Giving up your seat on public transport

In a recent university experiment only 20 per cent of London tube passengers offered to give up their seat to a visibly pregnant woman. According to Debrett’s, passengers should always offer to give up their seat to any individual that is pregnant, elderly, or clearly in need. It is important to remember, however, that it is just as rude to aggressively decline the offer of a seat as it is to not offer a seat.

7. Blind copying (bcc)

Debrett’s receive a high level of enquiries on best business practice. The most commonly asked question is whether it is ever right to blind copy (bcc) someone into an email. According to Debrett’s, blind copying should be used discerningly as it is deceptive to the primary recipient. Instead, the email should be forwarded on to the third party, with a short note explaining any confidentiality, after its distribution.

If blind copying is essential – i.e. for a confidential document where all recipients must remain anonymous – then the sender should address the email to themselves, and everyone else as ‘bcc’ recipients.

8. Eating before everyone is served

The final question is one that we’ve all asked ourselves: is it rude to start eating at the table before everyone else has been served? According to Debrett’s the simple answer is yes, unless the host or hostess gives their permission for diners to start.250年來，英國權威禮儀指導機構德佈雷特出版社一直給英國民衆提供了得體的社交禮儀細節上的指導，包括怎麼寫一封合適的感謝信，見到女王應該做些什麼等。

據英國《每日電訊報》10月28日報道，近日，德佈雷特出版社首次公佈現代社會的社交禮儀，解答2014年最困擾英國民衆的社交禮儀上的問題：

1. 使用手機

德佈雷特出版社收到最多的是詢問手機使用的問題。出版社指出，在與人交流時，總是低頭關注手機是非常粗魯無禮的行爲。在有些場合，比如在店裏結賬時，手機最好擱置在一旁。特別是在一些需要保持安靜的場所比如劇場、電影院（即使是在放片花的時候）和藝術畫廊，都應該關閉手機。

2.工作時吸電子煙

如今，電子煙越來越流行，因此，關於在工作時吸電子煙的問題也比較多，在工作場合能否吸電子煙是人們最想知道的。對此，出版社迴應稱，不應該在工作場合吸菸。吸電子煙表示你沒有專心工作，而且也會令其他同事工作分心。

3.接吻禮

很多人都不清楚在什麼情況下應該行接吻禮，出版社作出瞭解答。接吻禮在很多專業性場合都不適用。總體上來說，在親密朋友中比較常用，而對初次見面的朋友不適用。沒有肢體接觸的飛吻看起來比較無禮或沒有人情味，所以最好有輕微的肢體接觸，但不需要發出聲音。

4.在公共交通上吃東西或者補妝

出版社也收到很多人詢問在公共交通上是否可以吃東西或補妝。對此，出版社稱都應避免。在密閉環境中食用味道比較大的食物是不體諒他人的行爲，而在公共交通上補妝，把自己亂糟糟的一面展現給他人，會損壞自己給他人的第一印象。

5.乘機時把座椅靠背往後仰

這個問題很常見。出版社明確迴應稱，白天乘坐短途航班時把座椅靠背往後仰是自私的行爲。在乘坐乘機旅行時，還有以下注意點：呆在自己特定的位置，不要佔着扶手；不要踢你前面的座椅，或者扶着你前面的座椅站起來。

6.在公共交通上讓座

某大學的倫敦最近的實驗顯示，只有20%的倫敦地鐵乘客會給孕婦讓座。毫無疑問，出版社的回答是應該給老弱病殘孕或有需要的乘客讓座。而且，還應當記住的是，好勝地拒絕別人的讓座也是無禮的行爲。

7.暗抄送

商務實踐中的禮節也是民衆非常關心的問題，其中最普遍的即在發送郵件時是否可以使用暗抄送。出版社指出，對於原始收件人來說，發件人使用暗抄送是對收件人的隱瞞跟欺騙，因此應該謹慎使用。正確的做法是郵件發送完畢後再將郵件轉發給第三方，並附上一小段文字，解釋郵件中的內容的機密性。

如果一定要暗抄送，比如，要發送機密文件，接受者必須匿名時，那麼發送者可以使用暗抄送。

8.在所有人就坐前用餐

最後一個問題也是我們需要自省的問題：在所有人沒有全部就坐前用餐是無禮的嗎？答案當然是：是的。除非主人宣佈可以就餐，否則不可提前用餐。