職場上最不受待見的6種說話方式

研究表明，一個人的人際關係好壞和他平時的說話習慣是高度相關的。老話說得好，禍從口出，糟糕的說話方式很容易破壞你平日裏精心培養起來的人際關係。看看以下的6種說話的禁忌有沒有在你身上發生吧。

1. The Fake Agreement: Pretending to agree while expressing the opposite point of view.
1.虛假認同：假裝認同別人的同時卻表現出相反的觀點。

Typical usage: “I'm with you… but I just don’t think we should take on that project.”
經典語句：“我很贊同你的觀點……不過我不認爲我們應該採用那個項目。”

In reality you aren't really with me because then you would agree with what I’m saying. (Plus beginning a sentence with something like, “I hear you…” is like a condescending pat on the head.)
事實是你根本不同意我，因爲不管我說什麼你都會說你同意。（補充一句，如果一句話用“我聽說你……”這樣的語句來開頭的話，聽上去就好像上級拍着下級的腦袋在講話一樣。）

Don’t try to couch a different opinion inside a warm and fuzzy Fake Agreement. If you disagree, just say so professionally.
不要試着把不同的意見硬裝在一句友善的、模棱兩可的贊同中。你要是不同意，就直接正式地說出來。

2. The Unsupported Closure: Ending a discussion or making a decision without backup or solid justification.
2.缺乏支持的結束語：做出缺乏支持和有力證據的總結或決定。

Typical usage: “At the end of the day, we’re here to sell products.”
經典語句：“在今天的最後，我們爲了銷售產品走到了這一步。”

Really? I had no idea we’re supposed to sell products!
真的嗎？我根本不知道我們原來是要銷售產品啊！

The Unsupported Closure is the go-to move for people who want something a certain way and cannot or do not feel like explaining why. Whenever you feel one coming on, take a deep breath and start over; otherwise you’ll spout inane platitudes instead of objective reasons that may actually help your employees get behind your decision.
這種缺乏支持的結束語是說話人的一種強迫他人接受的說法。他希望某件事要以某種方式發展，但卻無法或是不願解釋爲什麼。每當你想到一個什麼點子的時候，最好作個深呼吸然後開始講述；不然你只會吐出大量毫無意義的陳詞濫調，而不是能夠幫到僱員們理解你的決定的那些客觀原因。

Quick note: A Fake Agreement combines nicely with an Unjustified Closure: “I hear what you’re saying, but at the end of the day revenue concerns must come first.” Win-win!
順便一提：虛假認同和缺乏支持的結束語簡直是天作之合：“我聽說你講的話了，不過在今天的最後還是應該先考慮收入問題。”瞧，簡直是雙贏啊！

3. The False Uncertainty: Pretending you’re not sure when in fact you really are.
3.假裝不確定：假裝你對某件事不確定，但實際上你非常確定。

Typical usage: “You know, when I think about it... I’m not so sure shutting down that facility isn’t the best option after all.”
經典語句：“你知道，當我仔細思考的時候……我不確定把那個工廠關掉是不是最好的選擇。”

Oh, you’re sure; you’re just trying to create buy-in or a sense of inclusion by pretending you still have an open mind… or you’re planting seeds for something you know you will eventually do.
噢，你根本就知道啊；你這只是爲了假裝你仍然覺得模棱兩可罷了……或者你正在爲你知道你最終會做的某件事情埋下伏筆而已。

Never say you aren’t sure unless you really aren't sure... and are truly willing to consider other viewpoints.
只要你不是真的不確定，而且真的願意考慮其他人的想法，就永遠都別說不確定……4. The First Person Theoretical: Pretending to be another person in order to explore different points of view.
4.第一人稱假設：爲了尋求不同的看法假設自己是另一個人

Typical usage: “Let’s say I’m the average customer and I walk in your store and want to buy a shirt...”
經典語句：“假設我是一個普通的消費者，我走進你的商店想要買件襯衫……”

You can get away with this one occasionally, but more than that is really irritating.
偶爾作出這種假設是可以的，但要是不停地這麼說，就真的很讓人惱火。

Don't believe me? Let’s say I’m the average reader and I know someone who uses the First Person Theoretical to pretend he's putting himself in another person's shoes. And let’s say I’m thinking it’s really irritating. And let’s say I’m…
不相信我的說法？那我們假設我是個普通的讀者，我認識一位經常使用第一人稱假設的人來表現自己善於換位思考的人。假設我覺得那非常惱人，假設我……

Let's just say I’m thinking we should move on.
假設我覺得我們該繼續下一個話題了。

5. The Favorite Phrase: Using a phrase so often that word is all anyone can hear.
5.語癖：總是重複地說同一個詞語，搞得大家除了這個詞外什麼都聽不進。

Typical usage: Any phrase that gets hammered to death. Here's an example.
經典語句：任何那些被人用爛了的詞語。下面舉個例子。

I knew someone who never met a sentence he couldn’t find a way to shoehorn in a random “in other words,” "as it relates to," or “in general.” Often he could cram all three into the same sentence multiple times.
我認識一個人，他說的每句話都可以被他硬塞進諸如“換句話說”、“提到……”或“通常而言”之類的套話。而且他經常可以在同一句話裏多次使用所有這三種表達形式。

Fall in love with a word or expression and not only do other people tire of it, they start to hear nothing else. Then whatever you hoped to get across gets lost as they think, “Oh jeez, for once could he leave out the ‘that’s neither here nor there’”?
當你愛上使用某個詞或是表達方式的時候，人們不但會對它感到厭煩，他們也開始聽不進別的東西。於是，不管你希望讓他們明白什麼，他們都不會聽進去。“噢天哪，他什麼時候可以不要說‘非此即彼’這個詞了啊。”

Ask someone if you overuse a word, phrase, or figure of speech. At first they’ll look uncomfortable and try to avoid answering. Insist.
問問別人你有沒有過度使用一個詞、句子、或是修辭。一開始他們會覺得不舒服，並且嘗試不作迴應，堅持聽下去。

Eventually they’ll tell you, and I guarantee you’ll never do it again.
但最終他們一定會告訴你，而且我保證你永遠都不會再那麼做了。

6. The Double Name: Using a person’s name twice (worst case using your own name twice) in the same sentence as a way to justify unusual or unacceptable behavior.
6.兩次提到同一個名字：在一句話中兩次提到一個人的名字（最糟糕的情況是兩次提到你自己的名字），期望以此來糾正別人反常的或是令你無法接受的行爲。

Typical usage: “What can I say?" Shrug. "That’s just Joe being Joe.” (Worse, “Hey, that’s just me being me.”)
經典語句：“我還能說些什麼呢？”聳聳肩，“Joe終歸是Joe啊。”（更糟糕的是，“嘿，我就是我現在這個樣子啊。”）

Whenever you use the double name you’re actually excusing behavior you would not tolerate from someone else.
無論何時你用了這種說法，你都是在爲一種你自己無法容忍別人那樣做的行爲辯護。

And everyone knows it.
而且大家都知道。