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不要擔心超出能力範圍的事

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How can I stop worrying about things that are beyond my control?
我怎樣才能不再爲超出我能力範圍的事擔心?

不要擔心超出能力範圍的事

獲得43.8k好評的回答@Dushka Zapata:

This is my favorite fortune cookie prediction ever and I carry it with me Always.
這是我最喜歡的幸運餅乾預測(西方中餐館給客人的包有預測未來運氣小紙條的小餅乾),我總是帶在身邊。


(你正在爲永遠不會發生的事擔心)

You see, I used to be a worrier.
跟你說,我過去總是憂心忡忡。
I worried all the time. I worried that something was going to happen to someone I loved, or that something was going to happen to me. I worried that my family was not safe in Mexico City (where I'm from). I worried that I forgot to close the garage door.
我總是在擔心。我擔心我所愛的人會發生什麼事,或者我自己會發生什麼事,我擔心家人在墨西哥城不安全(我就來自那裏),我擔心自己忘關車庫門。
Why was it hard for me to even consider letting go of something that could be making me sick?
爲什麼連考慮一下放下這些讓我頭疼的事對我來說都很難?
Because, even though for a long time I couldn't articulate this, I somehow believed that if I worried about something, I could prevent it. Yup. I believed that most things I worried about wouldn't happen precisely because I worried about them. I saw my worry as a sort of protective shield, an undetectable force that swirled around the people that I loved and accompanied them wherever they went like an aura/guardian, like a halo on an angel’s head.
因爲,有很長一段時間我雖然自己也說不清,但不知怎麼地我就是認爲如果我擔心某件事就能避免這件事發生。對,我相信大部分我所擔心的事都沒發生恰恰是因爲我的擔心。我把自己的擔心當作一種保護傘,一種圍繞在我愛的人身邊並隨他們到各處的無形力量,就像一個光環或守護者,就像天使頭上的光環。
I explained this to a friend who looked at me before asking "Nice. How is that working for you?"
我這樣跟朋友解釋後,朋友看了看我說:“很好,可這對你有什麼用呢?”
I was stumped. I was stunned.
我僵住了,蒙了。
I realized I had inadvertently been practicing being a worrier for years, and that, as such, I could un-learn it. I replaced every worry-thought with another thought. ("All is well". "Everything is going to be ok." Or even - "even if that was going to happen my worry is not going to prevent it".)
我意識到我無意中多慮了很多年,我同樣意識到可以改掉這個壞習慣。我把每種擔心都換成另外一個想法(“一切順利”、“一切都會好的”,或者甚至是“即使這件事真的發生了,我擔心也於事無補”)。
I can't say I don't worry anymore but I worry a lot less. And when I do, I get to work on letting that crap go.
我不能說我再沒有擔心過,但比過去少多了。要擔心時就努力把那些廢話從大腦中清理出去。

獲得911好評的回答@Mehek Bassi:

By asking yourself "WHY"?
問問你自己“爲什麼”?
You know that they are beyond your control, and despite knowing that, you are still worried? Why? Ask yourself "WHY?"
你知道這件事超出能力範圍了,即使知道,你還是會擔心?爲什麼?問問你自己“爲什麼?”
Once you get the answer of this why, (and the answer will be - because I'm stupid! So I worry about things I can't control), and after getting this answer, ask yourself another question "What can I change?" The answer will come out to be "Nothing!". And after asking these two questions, you won't be worried anymore. So you can move on from the thought and focus on things that matter, things that you can change, things that are in your control, things that are important!
你會找到這個問題的答案(答案是:因爲我蠢纔會爲解決不了的事擔心!),知道答案之後,再問自己一個問題:“我能改變什麼?”答案可能是“什麼都改變不了,”問完這兩個問題,你就不再擔心了。你的生活就能繼續了,把思想和注意力都放在有意義的、你能改變的、可控的、重要的事上!

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