美文賞析:愛自己，是一個女生應有的姿態

Not everyone reciprocates the gesture.
並不是每個人都會迴應你的付出。

This is a hard truth but it’s true.
這是個殘酷的事實，但現實的確如此。

If other people poured the same amount of effort into me as I pour into them, things would probably be different, but things aren’t always equal in friendships and relationships.
如果別人對我的付出，跟我對別人的付出一樣多，現實可能會有所不同。然而，友情和愛情中的付出總是不對等。

I honestly think that we should help other people and take care of them because it’s a good thing to do, not because we want something back.
老實說，我覺得我們應該幫助和關心別人，僅僅因爲這是一種善舉，而不是想要有所回報。

But by the same token, if we’re not getting anything back to sustain us when we need it, we shouldn’t help people to the point where we drain our own resources.
可是，由此類推，當我們需要幫助，卻什麼都得不到的時候，我們就不應該耗盡所有精力去幫助別人了。

I’m not being selfish.
我並不是自私。

Putting yourself first feels so wrong when you first start doing it.
剛開始去把自己放在第一位的時候，你會覺得很不好意思。

If you’re used to erasing your own needs to look after others, it seems too self-indulgent.
如果你習慣壓抑自己的需求去幫助別人，以自己爲優先的話，就會顯得很任性。

But actually,the only way to consistently and effectively help other people in the long-termis to make sure you’re in a good place yourself.
但是實際上，持續且高效地幫助別人的唯一方法，就是先讓自己保持良好的狀態。

I’m important too.
我也很重要。

It actually took me a while to get to the point where I can say this, but there’s no reason why my own wants and needs shouldn’t matter as much as the other people in my life.
我也是在經歷了很多之後，才意識到這一點。然而，日常生活中，我的需求並沒有理由比別人的需求低一等。

I deserve to have the same level of support and I certainly deserve to get where I want in life.
我應該得到同樣程度的支持，我應該得到我想要的、那種平等的地位。

I deserve to be happy.
我應該得到幸福。

Helping people has always made me happy and it still does, but I’ve come to understand I want another kind of happiness too – pride in my own achievements, emotional resilience, stuff that’s really to do with me and not anyone else.
幫助他人總是使我快樂，現在也是如此，可是我開始明白，我也需要其他種類的幸福——爲自己的成就、情緒恢復能力、以及真正與自己有關的事情而感到自豪。

It’s time to make that happen.
是時候這樣做了。