情侶吵架致勝寶典 幫你愛情保鮮（雙語）

想知道如何在和另一半爭吵時佔上風?在和愛人爭吵前，想清楚你想談的問題是什麼至關重要。下面快來看看情侶吵架致勝寶典吧！

A pile of dirty dishes, leaving the toilet seat up and cominghome drunk from the pub are just some of the scenarios thatcan spark blazing rows up and down the country.

一堆髒盤子，馬桶坐便圈沒放下，從酒吧喝得爛醉回家，這些事都可能讓你倆吵得天翻地覆、一塌糊塗。

In order to help couples squabble more successfully, leadinglawyer Jonathan Herring has penned a book called How ToArgue.

業內頂尖律師喬納森·赫林(Jonathan Herring)寫了一部名爲《如何講理》，幫助情侶如何在和另一半爭吵時佔上風。

In his entertaining, no-holds-barred guide, the Oxford-based professor reveals everything Britsneed to know about bickering and tips on how to emerge triumphant.

在他的書中，這位牛津大學教授毫無保留地傳授了所有英國人吵嘴需要知道的事以及如何獲勝的訣竅。

Before bumping heads with a loved one, Jonathan says it's vital to fully think through what it isyou want to say.

喬納森說，在和愛人爭吵前，想清楚你想談的問題是什麼至關重要。

'Make sure you know the essential points you want to make,' he said. 'Before starting anargument think carefully about what it is you are arguing about and what it is you want. This maysound obvious. But it's critically important. '

“你一定要清楚自己想說的關鍵問題。開始吵架前，仔細考慮好你在吵什麼，你想要的是什麼。這也許聽起來是顯而易見的事，但其實這極爲重要。”

After considering the strengths and weaknesses of your points, Jonathan says the timing andlocation of your quarrel is crucial.

喬納森說，考慮好自己觀點的優勢和劣勢後，吵架的時間和地點也十分重要。

'Think carefully before you start to argue: is this the time; is this the place?' he said.

“想吵架前，仔細想想，是對的時間嗎?對的地點嗎?”

Many people lose arguments because they get caught up in the heat of the moment and don'tfully listen to what it is the other person is saying.

很多人在爭吵中敗下陣來是因爲當時被怒火衝昏了頭腦，根本沒好好聽另一半說了些什麼。

To be victorious in a feud, Jonathan says you should let the other person do most of the talking.

喬納森說，想要在吵架中獲勝，你得讓對方暢所欲言。

'It sounds silly, but you should aim to listen for 75 per cent of the argument and only speak for 25per cent of it,' he said. 'If you listen intently you'll be able to beat their line of argument moreeasily.'

“這聽起來很傻，但你要做到用75%的時間聽對方說，僅用25%的時間表達自己的砍伐。如果你聽得很認真，就能更輕鬆的辯駁對方的論點。”

While being prepared and listening is key, he says that you should always have a 'get out' plan.

雖然充分準備和認真聽都十分重要，喬納森說，你還得準備個“停止爭吵”的計劃。

To stop the row 'ending in a deadlock' having a 'preformed solution' can put an end to anyuncomfortable arguments and help you to get what you want.

爲防止讓爭吵陷入僵局，最好事先準備一個很好的解決方案，這樣可以結束任何不愉快的爭吵，還能幫助你獲得你想要的結果。

Jonathan's final tip is to try and stay friends with your partner despite the conflict.

喬納森給出的最後一條建議是，儘管與另一半發生了衝突，但仍要保持你們間的友誼。

'You've got to ask yourself what the end game is when you're arguing with your partner,' he said. 'If you want to embarrass or humiliate them then it's eventually going to be bad for yourrelationship.

“問問自己和另一半爭吵之後想要什麼結果。如果你想羞辱或讓對方感到尷尬，最終這將對你們之間的關係有害。”

'Make sure there's a way you can make up, a sort of escape plan, so it doesn't linger longer than itneeds to.'

“你要確保有方法可以彌補兩個人的關係，那種‘逃跑方案’，讓這一頁快點翻過去。”