你知道嗎？英美人這樣說只是客氣而已！

In sociolinguistics and conversation analysis (CA), politeness strategies are speech acts that express concern for others and minimize threats to self-esteem ("face") in particular social contexts.

在社會語言學角度與會話分析角度下，禮貌策略指的是一種在特定社會背景下表達對他人的感受且將威脅自尊（面子）降低至最小程度的說話方式。

Positive politeness strategies are intended to avoid giving offense by highlighting friendliness. These strategies include juxtaposing criticism with compliments, establishing common ground, and using jokes, nicknames, honorifics, tag questions, special discourse markers (please), and in-group jargon and slang.

積極禮貌策略旨在強調友善以避免冒犯，其中包括：揚抑並舉、建立共同點、笑話、暱稱、敬語、附加疑問句、特殊話語標記（如：請）、圈內行話等。

Negative politeness strategies are intended to avoid giving offense by showing deference. These strategies include questioning, hedging, and presenting disagreements as opinions.

消極禮貌策略旨在表示尊敬以避免冒犯，其中包括：詢問、說話留餘地、用提議的方式表示反對。

Examples and Observations

舉例與評析

“Shut up!” is rude, even ruder than “Keep quiet!” In the polite version, “Do you think you would mind keeping quiet: this is, after all, a library, and other people are trying to concentrate,” everything in italics is extra. It is there to soften the demand, giving an impersonal reason for the request, and avoiding the brutally direct by the taking of trouble.

“閉嘴”這種說法很粗魯，甚至比“保持肅靜”還粗魯。用禮貌的話來說，應該是“你介意保持安靜嗎？畢竟這裏是圖書館，大家都是來這裏專心學習的。”斜體的部分都是多餘的。句中的斜體詞都是爲了緩和語氣之用，給出一個非個人的原因，避免產生麻煩。

再讓我們多看一些例子

"Professor, I was wondering if you could tell us about the Chamber of Secrets." 

“教授，你能多跟我們講講《哈利波特與密室》這部電影嗎？”

"Would you mind stepping aside? I got a purchase to make." 

“麻煩讓一讓好嗎？我要買這個東西。”

"'Sir,' the gentleman asked with a twang in his voice that was unmistakably Southern, 'would it bother you terribly if I joined you?'"

“‘先生’，這位男士的聲音裏帶有鼻音，沒有猜錯的話應該是南方口音，‘我加入你們會給麻煩你們嗎？’”

"'Laurence,' said Caroline, 'I don't think I'm going to be much help to you. I've had enough holiday-making. I'll stay for a couple of days but I want to get back to London and do some work, actually. Sorry to change my mind but--'”

“‘勞倫斯’，凱羅林說，‘我恐怕幫你不了你太多。我的假期已經夠長了。我還會再留幾天，但是我真的想回倫敦工作了。很抱歉我改變了心意，但是……’”

總結一下上文幾個例子中出現的禮貌委婉用語：

1、用來提出建議，可以說：

I was wondering if you could...

2、用來提出要求，可以說：

Do you think you would mind...

Would you mind...

Would it bother you (terribly/heavily...) to...

3、用來推脫，可以說：

I don't think...

Sorry ...

4、用來提出不同看法，可以說：

I don't think...