送給20多歲的姑娘們：這十件事你一定要記住
If there is one thing I know from experience, for most people, their "roaring twenties" are a time of exploration, confusion, and utter bafflement. I was recently asked what I would go back and tell my younger self. Here are a few things that came to mind.
如果說我從過往的經歷中明白了某件事，那就是對多數人來說，她們風華正茂的二十歲是一段充滿探索、困惑和極度迷茫的歲月。最近，有人問起我有什麼道理是我希望告訴年輕時的自己的。以下就是我能想到的一些忠告。
1. "Bad Boys" are best saved for movies.
1. “壞男孩”還是讓他們留在電影裏吧。
Bad boys are not exciting, they are chaotic, unreliable, unfocused and 99% of the time, they will cheat on you and don’t have a proper job. Just because they wear a cute outfit, flip off the establishment does not mean you should trust your heart or body with them.
壞男孩並沒有什麼讓人興奮的地方，他們混亂不堪，不可信賴，無法專注，他們會背叛你，更連個合適的工作都沒有。僅僅因爲他們衣着光鮮、反叛世俗，並不代表你可以把心或者身體放心交給他們。
2. You'll figure this out.
2. 有些道理，你總會明白。
Life is a series of steps and lessons. You only learn by doing, and sometimes, that means doing things you don't want to do, don't know how to do, shouldn't do and don't do well. Instead of worrying about what is not happening, pay attention to your growth and take it one step at a time.
人生需要一步一腳印，慢慢吸取教訓。你只有去做了，才能學到東西。有時，這意味着做你不願意做的事、不會做的事、不該做的事以及不擅長的事。與其擔心你沒有做到哪些，不如專注於你的成長，循序漸進。
3. No one will ever live up to a fantasy.
3. 沒有人能滿足你的幻想。
We, as humans, are flawed creatures. The point is not to find someone who is your "perfect match" but instead someone who shares your values, loves you, respects you, makes you smile, can live with your annoying habits, challenges you to be your best self and appreciates that you do the same for them.
我們生而爲人，難免有所缺陷。關鍵並不是找到你的完美伴侶，而是找到那個ta，那個與你共享價值觀、愛你敬你、讓你開心、能忍受你煩人的小習慣、挑戰你去做最好的自己、並能對你的同等付出心存感激的人。
4. Never chase anyone. Ever.
4. 不要追求別人。絕對不要。
People who want to be in your life will show up. Those who deserve to be in it will act right while there. Pretty simple.
那些想要出現在你人生中的人終會出現。值得出現在你人生中的人會在合適的時候做出正確的行動。就是這麼簡單。
5. Save a little money every week.
5. 每週都存點錢。
There will come a time in your life when you have an unexpected situation and need a little extra cash. Open a savings account and add to it every week. $100.00 when you can, $10.00 when you are really strapped.
人生中總會有些時候會發生意料之外的情況，需要一些額外的錢來擺平。開一個儲蓄賬戶，每週都存點錢。力所能及的時候存100，生活拮据的時候存10塊也好。
6. Rude first dates do not get second chances.
6. 不要給粗魯的初次約會對象第二次機會。
There was a study performed that said that a first date is a good indication of what the relationship will be like. Pay attention to how your date speaks about and to others, his or her facial expressions, and if they cross the line with you, leave.
有研究表明，初次約會是感情走向的最佳預示。關注約會對象的談吐、面部表情，要是超越了你的底線，就離開吧。
7. Toxic friendships are a waste of time.
7. 不良的友誼就是浪費時間。
Define what friendship really means to you and be that kind of friend to others. If you're not getting the support, love, loyalty and respect back-in any relationship-you need to move on. No matter how sticky or painful it might be initially.
衡量一下友誼對你的意義，自己先成爲那樣的朋友。如果你在任何關係中沒有得到愛、忠誠、支持和尊重，你就該放手了，無論這一開始有多艱難和痛苦。
8. Unless you really know someone well, do not travel with them.
8. 除非你很瞭解一個人，不然不要和他們一起旅行。
Ever.
絕對不要。
9. Wit is sexier than a push-up bra.
9. 智慧比上託型內衣更能讓你性感。
I am not going to sit here and pretend that a man doesn't have to find you attractive in order to date you. What I am saying is that focusing only on taking hot selfies and looking "sexy" is going to backfire. Yes, you get the initial spark of attention, but if you want to keep it, you'd better have something else to ignite a flame.
我不會假裝男人想跟你約會時並不用覺得你很有魅力。我是想說，只在意如何拍好看的自拍、看起來性感，會適得其反的。沒錯，你起初能吸引對方眼球，但你若要保持這樣的火花，最好是要有別的特質來點亮這團火才行。
10. Remember, this is your journey.
10. 記住，人生是你自己的旅程。
You are in this life and it is yours. You are the one who has to live with the decisions you make and the ones you don't. Loss is a very real thing in this life. You will lose people. You will lose opportunities. When this happens, will you regret not saying "I love you" or booking that trip or will you know you said everything you needed to say and took every chance you wanted to?
你主宰人生，主宰你自己的人生。你是那個對自己的決定付出代價的人。失去是生命中需要面對的現實，你會失去身邊的人，失去機會……當這些發生的時候你會後悔沒有說出那句“我愛你”、後悔沒有預定那次旅行，還是會慶幸自己說出了每一句要說的話、把握了每一次想要的機會呢？
