適合高中的英語笑話品析
冷笑話是一種特殊的幽默觀,一種輕鬆看待生活的態度,勇於挑戰傳統的桎梏,它的流行是特定時期的思想的反映,是後現代主義思潮的產物。下面小編整理了適合高中的英語笑話，希望大家喜歡!
青銅老鼠(中英)
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed，life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs.
"Twelve dollars for the rat，sir,”says the shop owner, "and a thousand dollars more for the story behind it.”
一名遊客在舊金山唐人街的一家破舊的古董店裏閒逛。他挑選着陳列架上的物品，發現了一隻做工精細、真實般大小的青銅老鼠。他拿起這個既有趣又獨特的雕像，問店主賣多少錢。
"You can keep the story, old man，”he replies. "but I'll take the rat.”
“這隻老鼠十二美元，先生”，店主說，“要知道它背後的故事，要再加一千美元。”經典的適合高中的英語笑話
“那個故事還是你自己留着吧，老頭，”他回答說，“我就要買這隻老鼠。”
The transaction complete， the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store; two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him. Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but every time he passes another sewer drain，more rats come out and follow him.
這筆交易結束後，這名遊客夾着這隻青銅老鼠離開了那個古董店。當他穿過店前的大街時，兩隻活老鼠從下水道里出來，跟在他的後面。他緊張地回頭看着，開始走得更快。但是，每當他走過一個下水道時就會出來更多的老鼠跟在他後面。
By the time he’s walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels，and people begin . to point and shout. He walks even faster, and soon breaks into a trot as multitudes of rats swarm from sewers, basements, vacant lots, and abandoned cars.
等到他走了兩個街區的時候，至少有一百隻老鼠跟在他的後面。人們開始指指點點並開始大叫。他走得更快了，甚至跑了起來，老鼠也從下水道、地下室、廢棄的停車場和報廢的汽車裏跟了出來。
Rats by the thousands are at his heels, and as he sees the waterfront at the bottom of the hill，he panics and starts to run for the bridge. Making a mighty leap, he jumps up onto a light post，grasping it with one arm while he hurls the bronze rat into San Francisco Bay with the other, as far as he can heave it. Pulling his legs up and clinging to the light post，he watches in amazement as the seething tide of rats surges over the breakwater into the sea，where they drown.
當他走到了山腳下的碼頭時，後面跟着的老鼠已經有上千只了。他開始變得恐慌，就向着大橋跑去。他用力一跳，跳到了一個燈杆上。他一手抓着燈杆，一隻手用盡全力地把那隻青銅老鼠扔向了舊金山海灣;他把雙腿夾緊燈杆，驚訝的看到，滾滾的鼠潮洶涌地衝向防洪堤，向着青銅老鼠人水的方向跳進了大海。
Shaken and mumbling, he makes his way back to the antique shop. "Ah, so you've come back for the rest of the story,” says the owner.
他全身顫抖，嘴裏還喃喃而語地回到了那個古董店。“啊，你是回來買那老鼠背後故事的吧?”店主問。
“No,”says the tourist，"but I was wondering if you have any bronze lawyers!”
“不是”，那個遊客說，“但是我想知道你們這裏有沒有賣青銅律師的!”
關於適合高中的英語笑話金髮美女和她的馬(中英)
There once was a really dumb blonde who had two horses. Now this blonde couldn’t tell her two horses apart so she decided to ask her neighbor to help her out. She said to her neighbor, "I have two horses that I can't tell apart, can you help me?"
從前有一個非常傻的金髮美女，她有兩匹馬。但是她不能分辨她那兩匹馬，所以就去請她的鄰居幫忙。她對鄰居說:“我有兩匹馬，但是我總分不清，你能幫我嗎?”
“Sure,” said her neighbor, "maybe you should nick one of their ears, then you could tell them apart.”
“當然可以，”她的鄰居說，“你也許可以在一匹的耳朵上做個標記，那樣你就能分清了。”
So, the blonde went home and did that. The next day the blonde went to check up on her horses but saw that she could not tell them apart for the other horse had nicked it’ s ear also. So, she went back over to her neighbor.
就這樣，她回家照着鄰居的話做了。第二天她檢查她的馬時，發現還是區別不了，因爲另一匹馬的耳朵上也有標記。所以，她又去找她的鄰居。
"My other horse has a nicked ear now too.” she said, “Do you have any other ideas how to tell them apart? They are both girls.”
“我的兩匹馬的耳朵上都有記號了，”她說，“你有什麼其它的辦法能把它們分開嗎?它們都是母馬。”
"Hmmmm.” thought her neighbor, "Cut one's tail shorter than the other!”
“嗯”，她的鄰居想了想說，“把一匹馬的尾巴剪短一些，”
So, the blonde went home and did that. The next day, though, both horses had the same length of tail! So, the blonde, tired of walking to her neighbor' s house decided to call instead.
那個金髮女郎又按照鄰居的話回家那麼做了。第二天，兩隻馬的尾巴還是一樣長!她徽得走了，於是就打電話給她的鄰居。
“I see,” said the neighbor after the blonde told her about how both of the tails were the same, "Try measuring them, maybe one is taller than the other.”
“我知道了，”當她的鄰居得知兩匹馬的尾巴一樣長以後說:“試着量量它們，也許一匹高一些，一匹矮一些。”
So the blonde did that，then rushed back into her house, phoned her neighbor and said to her" You were right!! The black horse is taller than the white one 1”
她又按鄰居的話做了一次，然後跑回屋裏給她的鄰居打電話說:“你是對的!那匹黑色的馬要比那匹白色的馬高。”
適合高中的英語笑話欣賞貸款(中英)
一個商人走進紐約的一家銀行，要找信貸員。他說要去歐洲出差兩個星期，想借5000美元。信貸員說對這樣的貸款需要一些擔保。於是商人把他的勞斯萊斯汽車的鑰匙拿了出來，車就停在銀行前面的大街上。一切談妥之後，銀行同意以汽車作爲抵押來借他這批錢。就這樣，汽車被一個僱員開進了銀行的地下停車場。
A businessman walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan. So the businessman hands over the keys to a Rolls Royce parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checks out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the Rolls into the bank’s underground garage and parks it there.
兩星期後，商人回來了，償還了5000美元，並支付了15.14美元的利息。信貸員說“我們合作的非常愉快，所有事情都非常順利。但是，有一點我們覺得有些奇怪，當您離開以後，我們調查到您是一位大富翁，爲什麼以一輛勞斯萊斯汽車作爲抵押卻只貸款5000美元呢?”富翁回答說:“在紐約，除了這裏，我到哪裏還能找到停兩個星期車只收巧美元的地方呢?”
Two weeks later, the businessman returns，repays the $5，000 and the interest, which comes to $ loan officer says, "We are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely，but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why would you bother to borrow $5，000?" The businessman replied, "Where else in New York can I park my car for two weeks for 15 bucks?"
