經典爆笑兒童英文笑話大全笑死人

笑話是民間文化的一個重要門類,笑話使人捧腹,在引人發笑之餘,也讓人慨嘆,發人深思。小編精心收集了經典爆笑兒童英文笑話，供大家欣賞學習!

　　經典爆笑兒童英文笑話：Snake Bite

Two brothers go camping. Billy is wearing his FAVORITE shirt in the whole world!

Suddenly, Philip gets bit by a poisonous snake.

Billy calls the doctor.

He tells the story and they reply back.

"This is TERIBLE! Quick, wrap his bite with something like your shirt or he might die."

Philip cries out a question, "What did the

"Doctor says you’re going to die!"

　　經典爆笑兒童英文笑話：Do Farts Have.......

A kindergarten teacher one day is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. The first student raised his hand and said "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said, "Well, that isn't entirely correct, because sometimes it's gray and cloudy".

Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher again replies "If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct either."

Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher looked at him and said " that isn't really a question you want to ask in class discussion." So the student replies, "Then I definitely shit my pants."

　　經典爆笑兒童英文笑話：Sherlock Homes

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip.

After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and went to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?" Holmes asked,Watson pondered for a minute.

"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.

Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.

Theologically, I can see that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

"What does it tell you?" Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke.

"Watson, you idiot. Somebody has stolen our tent!"

　　經典爆笑兒童英文笑話：Intelligence

Two men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, "Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?" "I don't know," responded the other. "I'll ask him."

So he climbed out of the hole and went to his boss. "Why are we digging in the hot sun and you're standing in the shade?" "Intelligence," the boss said. "What do you mean, �intelligence'?"

The boss said, "Well, I'll show you. I'll put my hand on this tree and I want you to hit it with your fist as hard as you can." The ditch digger took a mighty swing and tried to hit the boss' hand. The boss removed his hand and the ditch digger hit the tree. The boss said, "That's intelligence!"

The ditch digger went back to his hole. His friend asked, "What did he say?" "He said we are down here because of intelligence." "What's intelligence?" said the friend. The ditch digger put his hand on his face and said, "Take your shovel and hit my hand."

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