《美食祈禱和戀愛》Chapter 32 (67):意大利語突飛猛進大綱

He's surprised. He didn't realize I spoke Italian. Neither did I, actually, but we talk for about twenty minutes and I realize for the first time that I do. Some line has been crossed and I'm actually speaking Italian now. I'm not translating; I'm talking. Of course, there's a mistake in every sentence, and I only know three tenses, but I can communicate with this guy without much effort. Me la cavo, is how you would say it in Italian, which basically means, "I can get by," but comes from the same verb you use to talk about uncorking a bottle of wine, meaning, "I can use this language to extract myself from tight situations."

他吃了一驚，沒想到我會講意大利語。事實上，我也沒想到，但我們講了大約二十分鐘後，才第一次明白自己會講呢。我已跨越某條界線，現在我竟然講着意大利語。我不在翻譯，而在講話。當然，每一句都容有錯誤之處，而我只知道三種時態，卻沒費多少勁就能和這傢伙溝通。意大利語“me la”，基本上是“混得過去”的意思，跟談論拔開酒瓶塞時用的是同一個動詞，意即“我可以用這個語言讓自己從緊繃的狀況抽身而出”。我擺脫尷尬局面。

He's hitting on me, this kid! It's not entirely unflattering. He's not entirely unattractive. Though he's not remotely uncocky, either. At one point he says to me in Italian, meaning to be complimentary, of course, "You're not too fat, for an American woman."

他在招惹我，這小子！這並非不討人喜歡。他並非不迷人。儘管他顯得太自信。他一度用意大利語告訴我，儘管本意是恭維：“就美國女人而言，你不太胖。”

I reply in English, "And you're not too greasy, for an Italian man."

我用英語回答：“就意大利男人而言，你不太奉承。”

"Come?"

“Come？”

I repeat myself, in slightly modified Italian: "And you're so gracious, just like all Italian men."

我重複一次，用稍作修正過的意大利語說：“你很殷勤，就像所有的意大利男人。”

I can speak this language! The kid thinks I like him, but it's the words I'm flirting with. My God—I have decanted myself! I have uncorked my tongue, and Italian is pouring forth! He wants me to meet him later in Venice, but I don't have the first interest in him. I'm just lovesick over the language, so I let him slide away. Anyhow, I've already got a date in Venice. I'm meeting my friend Linda there.

我能講這語言！這小子以爲我喜歡他，然而我是在和文字調情。我的天——我正在瀝乾自己！我已拔掉舌頭的瓶塞，意大利語滔滔不絕地冒了出來！他要我之後和他在威尼斯會面，但他已經不像一開始讓我感興趣。我只爲語言害了相思病，因此我讓他脫逃而去。無論如何，我在威尼斯已經有約。我在那兒將和我的朋友琳達見面。

Crazy Linda, as I like to call her, even though she isn't, is coming to Venice from Seattle, another damp and gray town. She wanted to come see me in Italy, so I invited her along on this leg of my trip because I refuse—I absolutely decline—to go to the most romantic city on earth by myself, no, not now, not this year. I could just picture myself all alone, in the butt end of a gondola, getting dragged through the mist by a crooning gondolier as I . . . read a magazine? It's a sad image, rather like the idea of humping up a hill all by yourself on a bicycle-built-for-two. So Linda will provide me with company, and good company, at that.

狂人琳達——我喜歡這麼叫她，儘管她並不瘋狂——從另一個潮溼灰暗的城市西雅圖來到威尼斯。她要來意大利看我，因此我邀她參與這一段旅程，因爲我拒絕——絕對不願——獨自前往世上最浪漫的城市，現在可不行，今年不行。我想象孤伶伶一人坐在平底船的一端，由哼着小曲的船伕在霧中載着前進，而我則……閱讀雜誌？這是一幅可悲的畫面，好比獨自一人騎着雙人腳踏車使勁兒爬上山。因此琳達陪伴我，而且是絕佳的伴兒。

I met Linda (and her dreadlocks, and her piercings) in Bali almost two years ago, when I went for that Yoga retreat. Since then, we've done a trip to Costa Rica together, too. She's one of my favorite traveling companions, an unflappable and entertaining and surprisingly organized little pixie in tight red crushed-velvet pants. Linda is the owner of one of the world's more intact psyches, with an incomprehension for depression and a self-esteem that has never even considered being anything but high. She said to me once, while regarding herself in a mirror, "Admittedly, I am not the one who looks fantastic in everything, but still I cannot help loving myself." She's got this ability to shut me up when I start fretting over metaphysical questions, such as, "What is the nature of the universe?" (Linda's reply: "My only question is: Why ask?") Linda would like to someday grow her dreadlocks so long she could weave them into a wire-supported structure on the top of her head "like a topiary" and maybe store a bird there. The Balinese loved Linda. So did the Costa Ricans. When she's not taking care of her pet lizards and ferrets, she is managing a software development team in Seattle and making more money than any of us.

大約兩年前，我在巴厘島參加瑜伽訓練營時遇上琳達（留着細髮辮，在身上穿洞）。在那之後，我們還一起去哥斯達黎加旅遊。她是我最喜愛的旅伴，一個冷靜、有趣、井井有條、身穿紅色緊身天鵝絨長褲的小精靈。她是世界上心靈較健康的人之一，無法理解抑鬱是什麼，還擁有高得不能再高的自尊。她曾看着鏡子裏的自己，對我說：“我固然不是什麼了不起的人，卻還是禁不住愛上自己。”當我爲形而上的問題，比方說"宇宙的本質是什麼？而憂心忡忡時，她總有法子讓我閉嘴（琳達答道：“我唯一的問題是：何必問？”）。琳達希望把髮辮留長，有一天能在頭頂編成鋼絲支撐的結構，“類似樹雕”，或許在裏頭擺只鳥。巴釐人愛琳達。哥斯達黎加人也愛她。她不在照顧自己的寵物蜥蜴和白鼬時，就在西雅圖管理一個軟件開發小組，賺的錢比我們任何人都多。

So we find each other there in Venice, and Linda frowns at our map of the city, turns it upside down, locates our hotel, orients herself and announces with characteristic humility: "We are the mayors of this town's ass."

於是我們在威尼斯碰面，琳達瞪了瞪我們的市區地圖，把地圖倒過來尋找我們的旅館位置，確定自己的方位，以特有的謙虛態度宣佈：“我們是城市屁股的市長。”