世紀文學經典:《百年孤獨》第9章Part 7

The regular army had to protect the house. He arrived amid insults, spat upon, accused of having accelerated the war in order to sell it for a better price. He was trembling with fever and cold and his armpits were studded with sores again. Six Months before, when she had heard talk about the armistice, úrsula had opened up and swept out the bridal chamber and had burned myrrh in the corners, thinking that he would come back ready to grow old slowly among Remedios' musty dolls. But actually, during the last two years he had paid his final dues to life, including growing old. When he passed by the silver shop, which úrsula had prepared with special diligence, he did not even notice that the keys were in the lock. He did not notice the minute, tearing destruction that time had wreaked on the house and that, after such a prolonged absence, would have looked like a disaster to any man who had kept his memories alive. He was not pained by the peeling of the whitewash on the walls or the dirty, cottony cobwebs inthe corners or the dust on the begonias or the veins left on the beams by the termites or the moss on the hinges or any of the insidious traps that nostalgia offered him. He sat down on the porch, wrapped in his blanket and with his boots still on, as if only waiting for it to clear, and he spent the whole afternoon watching it rain on the begonias. úrsula understood then that they would not have him home for long. "If it's not the war," she thought, "it can only be death." It was a supposition that was so neat, so convincing that she identified it as a premonition.
That night, at dinner, the supposed Aureli-ano Segun-do broke his bread with his right hand and drank his soup with his left. His twin brother, the supposed José Arcadio Segundo, broke his bread with his left hand and drank his soup with his right. So precise was their coordination that they did not look like two brothers sitting opposite each other but like a trick with mirrors. The spectacle that the twins had invented when they became aware that they were equal was repeated in honor of the new arrival. But Colonel Aureli-ano Buendía did not notice it. He seemed so alien to everything that he did not even notice Remedios the Beauty as she passed by naked on her way to her bedroom. úrsula was the only one who dared disturb his, abstraction.
"If you have to go away again," she said halfway through dinner, "at least try to remember how we were tonight."
Then Colonel Aureli-ano Buendía realized, without surprise, that úrsula was the only human being who had succeeded in penetrating his misery, and for the first time in many years he looked her in the face. Her skin was leathery, her teeth decayed, her hair faded and colorless, and her look frightened. He compared her with the oldest memory that he had of her, the afternoon when he had the premonition that a pot of boiling soup was going to fall off the table, and he found her broken to pieces. In an instant he discovered the scratches, the welts, the sores, the ulcers, and the scan that had been left on her by more than half a century of daily life, and he saw that those damages did not even arouse a feeling of pity in him. Then he made one last effort to search in his heart for the place where his affection had rotted away and he could not find it. On another occasion, he felt at least a confused sense of shame when he found the smell of úrsula on his own skin, and more than once he felt her thoughts interfering with his. But all of that had been wiped out by the war. Even Remedios, his wife, at that moment was a hazy image of someone who might have been his daughter. The countless women he had known on the desert of love and who had spread his seed all along the coast had left no trace in his feelings. Most of them had come into his room in the dark and had left before dawn, and on the following day they were nothing but a touch of fatigue in his bodily memory. The only affection that prevailed against time and the war was that which he had felt for his brother José Arcadio when they both were children, and it was not based on love but on complicity.
"I'm sorry," he excused himself from úrsula's request. "It's just that the war has done away with everything."

政府軍不得不在宅子前面設置警衛。奧雷連諾上校是在譏笑和唾罵聲中口到馬孔多的，有人指責他爲了較高的售價故意拖延戰爭。寒熱病使他不住地發抖，腋下的膿瘡又發作了，六個月以前，烏蘇娜聽到停戰消息的時候，就打開和收拾了兒子的臥室，在各個角落裏燒起了沒藥 ，以爲兒子回來之後就會在雷麥黛絲破舊的玩具中間安度晚年了。其實，在過去的兩年中，他已經算清了一生的賬，甚至談不上什麼晚年了。他經過烏蘇娜拾掇得特別仔細的首飾作坊時，沒有發現鑰匙是留在鎖孔裏的。而且在這房子裏，時光造成的細微而令人難過的破壞，也沒引起他的注意，任何一個記性很好的人，在長久離開之後，看見這些破壞都是會震驚的，可是任何東西都沒引起他心中的痛苦：牆上剝落的灰泥，角落裏凌亂的蛛網，棄置不顧的秋海棠，白蟻蛀壞的木樑，長了青苔的門框，一懷舊之情給他設置的這些詭譎的陷階都沒使他掉進去。他坐在長廊上，用毛毯裹着身子，也沒脫掉靴子，彷彿是順便到房子裏來躲雨的，整個兒下午都瞧着雨水落到秋海棠上。烏蘇娜終於明白。她無法長久把他留在家裏。“也許還要去打仗。”她想，“如果不是打仗，那就是死。”這種想法是那麼明確、可信，烏蘇娜認爲它是一種預兆。
傍晚，吃晚飯的時候，奧雷連諾第二右芋拿麪包，左手握湯匙。他的孿生兄弟霍·阿卡蒂奧第二呢，左手拿麪包，右手握湯匙。兩人動作起來是那麼協調，彷彿不是面對面坐着的兩兄弟，而是一種巧妙的鏡子裝置。孿生兄弟知道他們兩人完全相似，就在那天想出這種表演來歡迎奧雷連諾上校。可是奧雷連諾上校什麼也沒看見。他對周圍的一切是那麼疏遠，甚至沒有注意到赤身露體經過飯廳的俏姑娘雷麥黛絲。只有烏蘇娜一人敢於把他從沉思狀態中喚醒過來。
“假如你又要走，”她在晚餐時說。“你起碼應當記住今兒晚上我們是什麼樣子。”
奧雷連諾上校這時明白，烏蘇娜是唯一識破他精神空虛的人，但他並不覺得奇怪。他多年來第一次直勾勾地盯地她的面孔。她的皮膚佈滿了皺紋，牙齒已經磨損，頭髮枯萎、稀疏，眼神顯得驚恐。他拿她跟老早以前那天下午的烏蘇娜比較了一下，當時他曾預言熱湯鍋將要掉到地上，結果真的掉下去粉碎了。片刻間，他發現了半個多世紀日常的操勞在她身上留下的擦傷、繭子、瘡瘓和傷疤，這些可悲的痕跡甚至沒有引起他一般的憐憫。於是他作了最後的努力，在自己心中尋找善良的感情已經發黴的地方，可是找不到它。從前，他在自己的皮膚上聞到烏蘇娜的氣味時，起碼還有一點羞澀之類的感覺，而且經常覺得他的思想和母親的思想息息相通，但這一切都被戰爭消滅了。甚至他的妻子雷麥黛絲，在他心中也只剩下一個陌生姑娘模糊的形象，這姑娘在年齡上是相當於他的女兒的·他在愛情的沙漠上邂逅過許多女人，他和她們在沿海地帶撒下了不少種子，但是他的心裏卻沒留下她們的任何痕跡。通常，她們都在黑夜裏來找他，黎明前就離去，第二天已經沒有什麼東西使他想起她們，剩下的只是整個身體上某種睏乏的感覺。能夠勝過時間和戰爭的唯一的感情，是他童年時代對哥哥霍·阿卡蒂奧的感情，但它的基礎不是愛，而是串通。
“對不起，”他抱歉地回答烏蘇娜的要求。“戰爭把一切都葬送啦。”