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2分鐘英語笑話短文閱讀

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近年來,冷笑話作爲一種新興的語言現象在網絡、雜誌上十分盛行。本文是2分鐘英語笑話短文,希望對大家有幫助!

2分鐘英語笑話短文閱讀
  2分鐘英語笑話短文:說些悲哀的敬事

Bill,Jim,and Scott were at a convention together

比爾,吉姆,和史考特一起參加一場會議,

and were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75story sky-scraper.

並且在一棟七十五層摩天大樓的頂樓合住一間大套房.

After a long day of meetings

在一整天的會議之後,

they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken

他們非常驚訝地聽說他們飯店的電梯壞掉了,

and they would have to climb 75 flights stairs to get to their room.

他們必須要爬七十五層的一樓梯回到他們的房間。

Bill said to Jim and Scott,

比爾對吉姆和史考特說,

Let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting .

讓我們把精神集中在有趣的事情上,來打發這件令人不爽快又單調 乏味的苦差事。

I will tell jokes for 25 flights,

前二十五層我來說笑話,

and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights ,

後二十五層吉姆可 以唱歌,

and Scott can tell sad stories the rest of the way.

剩下的路程史考特可以說些悲哀的故事。

At the 26th floor bill stopped telling jockes and Jim began to sing,

到了二十六層 ,比爾停止說笑話,吉姆開始唱歌。

At the 51st floor Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories.

到了五十一層,吉姆停止唱歌,史考特開始說些悲哀的敬事。

"I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car!"

他說:“首先 ,我要說我最悲哀的故事,我把房間鑰匙留在車子裏面了!”

  2分鐘英語笑話短文:剛纔哪一位要乾淨的杯子的

joe and fred were helping to build a house in a village. the weather was very warm, there was a lot of dust everywhere, and by half past twelve, they were very thirsty, so they stopped work to have their lunch. they found the nearest small bar, went in and sat down with their sandwiches.

喬和佛瑞德在一個村子裏幫忙蓋一間房子。天氣很暖和,到處都有許多灰塵。12點半的時候,他們覺得非常口渴,便停下來去吃午飯了。他們找到最近的一家酒吧,走進去坐下吃他們的三明治。

good afternoon, gentlemen. what can i get you? the man behind the bar asked.

下午好,先生。你們想要點什麼?櫃檯後面的伺應問道。

joe looked at fred and said, beer, i think. yes, a pint of beer each. is that all right for you, fred?

喬看了看佛瑞德說:我想,啤酒吧。好,那就每人一品脫啤酒。這樣可以嗎,佛瑞德?

yes, that's all right. fred said. then he turned to the man behind the bar and said, and i want it in a clean glass! don't forget that.

好的,可以。佛瑞德說。然後他轉過去跟櫃檯後面的侍應說:我要啤酒裝在一個乾淨的杯子裏!別忘了。

the man behind the bar filled the glasses and brought them to joe and fred. then he said. which of you asked for the clean glass?

櫃檯後面的侍應倒滿杯子後,拿給喬和佛瑞德,接着說:剛纔哪一位要乾淨的杯子的?

  2分鐘英語笑話短文:願上帝與你一起實現你的夢想

farmer purchases an old, run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds, the farmhouse is falling apart, and the fences are collapsing all around.

During his first day of work, the town preacher stops by to bless the man's work, saying, May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!

A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. Look and behold. It's like a completely different place -- the farmhouse is completely rebuilt and in excellent condition, there are plenty of cattle and other livestock happily munching on feed in well-fenced pens, and the fields are filled with crops planted in neat rows. Amazing! the preacher says. Look what God and you have accomplished together!

Yes, reverend, says the farmer, but remember what the farm was like when God was working it alone!

一個農民買了一塊破舊、荒廢的農場,他計劃着把農場改造成一座欣欣向榮的園林。農場目前的狀況是雜草遍佈,房屋破舊不堪,四周的籬笆也東倒西歪。

在他着手改造的第一天,一個城裏的傳教士停下來祝福他:願上帝與你一起實現你的夢想!

過了幾個月,那個傳教士又一次來拜訪農民。駐足觀看,這裏發生了天翻地覆的變化:房屋重新被整修過,條件也優於從前,成羣的牛羊正在歡快地吃着青草,地裏的莊稼也成排地生長着。太不可思議了,傳教士驚呼道,看啊,上帝和你一起實現了你的夢想!

是的,教士,那個農民說道:可你別忘了,當初這個農場只由上帝一人管理時是個什麼樣子!


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