經典有趣的英語笑話

學習英語貴在堅持，找到適合自己的方法，多運用多溫故，所以小編今天就給大家帶來了英語的笑話，歡迎閱讀學習

　　英語笑話一

As a band instructor at an elementary school, I require my students to turn in practice sheets signed by their parents so I can be sure they are putting in enough time. 作爲一個小學的樂隊指揮，爲了確保學生投入足夠的時間練習，我要求他們上交由他們父母簽字的練習單。 I had to laugh, however, when one parent wrote on her child's sheet, "Practiced 17 minutes, but it seemed like hours. 可是有一次，一位家長的簽字把我逗樂了。練習單上寫着：“練習了17分鐘，但猶如幾個時辰。” 【註釋】

(1) band n.樂隊

(2) instructor n.指揮

(3) turn in上交;歸還

(4) signed by their parents:由他們的父母簽名的。這是一個分詞短語作定語修飾sheets.

(5) so I can be sure they are putting in enough time:這樣我才能確定他們投入了足夠的時間。這是so that 引導的目的狀語從句，其中that省略。

　　英語笑話二

A dog owner claimed that his pet, when given money, would go to the news stall to buy a paper. his friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - the dog trotted off, but an hour later he had still not returned with the paper. 一位養狗人宣稱：要是給了愛犬錢，它便會到賣報亭買份報紙來。他的朋友堅持要來個演示，並給了狗一些錢。狗一溜小跑着去了。但一個小時過去了，仍不見它帶報紙回來。 "how much did you give him?" asked the owner. 一位養狗人宣稱：要是給了愛犬錢，它便會到賣報亭買份報紙來。他的朋友堅持要來個演示，並給了狗一些錢。狗一溜小跑着去了。但一個小時過去了，仍不見它帶報紙回來。 "five dollars. “五元。” "well, that explains it. when you give him five dollars, he goes to a movie. "這就是了。你給它五元錢時，它就去看電影。 【註釋】

(1) claim v.聲稱

(2) when given money是 when he was given money 的省略

(3) news stall n.售報亭

(4) insist on 堅持

(5) demonstration n.演示

(6) trot off 小步跑開

　　英語笑話三

To prevent our dog, Lacy, from pestering visitors to our house, my mother often massaged her as she lounged beneath the kitchen table, her favorite resting spot. One day a contractor came over to talk about a home-improvement project. 爲避免我們的狗，萊希，糾纏來訪的客人，我母親常在愛犬喜歡呆的地方，即餐桌下面，摩暱它。一天，一個建築商來談居室裝潢工程。 As he and my mother sat across the table discussing the renovations, my mother slipped off her shoes and mindlessly soothed Lacy with her feet. 在這人和我母親坐在餐桌邊談居室的修茸時，我母親滑脫了她的鞋子，開始不經意地用腳摩蹭起萊希來。

My mother had been talking for about a half-hour when to her great embarrassment she heard Lacy bark outside the front door. 談話進行了半個小時的時候，我母親突然感到很不好意思起來，因爲這時她聽到了萊希在前門外的犬吠聲。 【註釋】

(1) prevent (from)v.避免;阻止

(2) pester v.使苦惱;困擾

(3) massage v.按摩;揉捏

(4) lounge v.懶洋洋地坐着或站着

(5) contractor n.承包商

(6) improvement n.改進;改善

(7) renovation n.修復;修理

(8) slip off滑脫;掉

(9) mindlessly adv.不注意地