雙語笑話:委婉的報喪方式
Two brothers, Herbert and James, lived with their mother and a cat named Edgar. James was particularly attached to the cat, and when he had to leave town for several days, he left Herbert meticulous instructions about the pet' s care. At the end of this first day away. James telephoned his brother. "How is Edgar?"
"Edgar is dead." Herbert answered. There was a pause. Then James said, "Herbert, you're insensitive, you know how close I was to Edgar —you should have broken the news to me slowly. When I asked about Edgar tonight, you should have said, 'Edgar's on the roof , but I have called the fire department to get him down.' And tomorrow when I called, you could have said the firemen were having trouble getting Edgar down, but you were hopeful they would succeed. Then when I called the third time, you could have told me that the fire-men have done their best, but unfortunately Edgar had fallen off the roof and was at the veterinarian's. Then when I called the last time, you could have said that although everything possible had been done for Edgar, he had died. That's the way a sensitive man would have told me about Edgar. And, oh, before I forget," James added, "how is mother?""Oh," Herbert said, pausing for a moment, "She' s on the roof."
郝伯特和詹姆斯兄弟二人一起生活，家中有一老母並養了一隻貓叫埃德格。詹姆斯特別喜歡這隻貓。有一次他要外出幾天，臨行前不厭其煩地囑咐郝伯特照顧好這隻寵物。出門後的頭一天晚上，他打來電話詢問：“埃德格好嗎？”
“它死了，”郝伯格回答。一陣沉默之後，詹姆斯說：“郝伯特，你真沒心沒肺，你知道我多麼喜歡埃德格——你應該把這個消息慢慢地告訴我。當我問起埃德格今晚怎樣時，你應該說，‘埃德格爬上了屋頂，我已給消防隊打了電話，讓他們把它救下來。’我明天又給你打電話時，你應該說消防隊營救埃德格遇到了困難，但你相信他們會成功。在我第三天給你打電話時，你可以說消防隊員已盡了最大努力，但很不幸，埃德格從屋頂上掉了下來，被送到獸醫那裏。在我最後一次給你打電話詢問，你可以說盡管對埃德格做了一切所能做的努力，它還是死了。這是一個富有感情的人告訴我埃德格的消息時所用的方式。哦，趁我沒忘記還有件事順便問一下，”詹姆斯補充道，“母親好嗎？”
“哦……”一陣沉默後郝伯特答道，“她上了屋頂。”
